Fast and Furious: What Happened to “The”?

Hollywood certainly has achieved a new low when it comes to knocking out crappy sequels.  Instead of making a totally new and unique movie-going experience that most regular folk would expect for between $8-10 dollars, Tinseltown has decided just to show reruns. 

Up until now, the movie making community has at least, made the titles somewhat fresh.  This is obviously not the case with Fast and Furious.  How would Universal Pictures deem this film different from the others in the franchise?  The first film was called, The Fast and the Furious.  Ah, omitting now equals originality in Hollywood.   

This film has plenty of fast cars, faster women, law breakers and law givers.  Just like the other three films that came before.  Surely, there are differences in the plot, a movie buff would wonder.  Not so fast.  While the original film with Vin Diesel had illegal street racing, this inception has illegal street racing down to Mexico.  Not only did Diesel reprise his role, he actually gets producing creds on this thing.  Next for the mighty Vin?  He’ll probably get to direct a sequel to The Bridge On the River Kwai, aptly titled, The Bridge Over the River Kwai.  Wouldn’t want to confuse the titles, of course. 

This movie really has the potential to offend a wide variety of target audiences.  Everyone from real car buffs groaning about what vehicles a true film would showcase, to the whiny carbon footprint dorks that are worried that Mr. Diesel didn’t inflate his tires to the proper pressure to save gas mileage.  Thus, it is a film without a fan base to champion it’s wares. 

Of course, take all this with a grain of salt.  Economy fretters decided to donate roughly $72 million to this work of art over the weekend.

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